oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
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