life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize