That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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