And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
