girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
