summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
