yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
