Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
