I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
