Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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