I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize