YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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