is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize