Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
