And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
