who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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