id be glad to
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
