very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize