i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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