Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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