TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
