If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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