How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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