Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
