Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
