Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize