Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
