Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
