Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
