Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
