Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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