Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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