I just made out with a guy for $7.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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