I can text with my tongue
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
