I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Life without a bra equals bliss.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
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