I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
