the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize