Have you finally orgasmed yet?
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
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