Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
