I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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