it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
