we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
