Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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