He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Randomize
