Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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