His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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