you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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