Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
