You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Randomize
