You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
